Being a father

After losing our first child, we both were very skeptical about our second child and kept a low profile as in like not telling it upfront to anyone. Finally the day came when we were blessed with a baby girl. When the doc rushed in to the corridor calling out for me saying my wife’s name as “Raina’s baby”, I was confused whether or not the child was mine, as the doc mispronounced my wife’s name. My wife’s name is Rainan. I figured out it’s me she was referring to, so I went up to her, she smiled at me and put my baby in my arms almost immediately and gave me one more broad smile, congratulated me and told me she is a cute baby. I was so very nervous. She was so fragile. However I cleared my doubt about whether she was my baby or not, I verified my doctor’s name :-). After a long wait finally everybody gathered in our allotted ward and rejoiced. I could see a sense of relief in everyone’s face. My wife also managed to smile with all the operation pain . The joy of being a father is different, it’s nice to see a child’s serene face, I am sure it’s even more if the baby is yours. Back in my mind so many things started creeping in, like…. will I be a good father, will I be able to give my child all that she requires, don’t forget to collect the vaccinations chart, and the baby clothes, oh damn we need diapers, which school and all kinds of other similar stuff.

After 3 days in hospital we came back home. That day was a nightmare. She started crying at 10 at night and kept doing so till 2:30 in the morning. Finally we took her to the hospital and doc diagnosed the possible reason as hunger or colic and gave few drops of colicaid and after some time things came back to normal. That was one scary night, I was like…. fish man it’s only the first day.

Soon came the day when I had to change diapers. God the smell..!!( I usually escape all this because my mom and mom-in-law was there). Anyways days rolled by… actually its still rolling…long sleepless nights … rocking her in my arms... and I love kissing her on the cheeks, although everybody instantly shouts at me “Ur beard will hurt her”, which I always ignore. She smells so good like all babies. I keep staring at her tender hands and feet. But I have to admit mothers go through a lot while raising a baby, because it’s not fun all the way. A baby requires constant attention of someone and that someone is always “mother”. It could be tiresome at times. Its really amazing a baby can recognize her mother’s smell in less than 4 hours, when I have to wait for 40 days before she recognize me as someone in her life or so the book says... she might be thinking like “who is this with thorns all over the face who tortures me everyday”.. he he.

I have seen a lot of changes in my wife. She is much more dedicated than I have imagined she would be. Being parents brings along with it a lot of responsibility. It teaches you patience, love and compassion. It requires patience because you have to take care of the little birdie day in and day out, and sometimes it can be nerve racking.

We’ve named her Aisha Yasmin . She also has a number of nick names like my wife at times refers to her as "sorai", which means bird in Assamese. It kinda suits her as she is small and at times she also makes sounds like a bird. I have failed to play any singnificant role as of now, which I regret. Maybe someday...